March 26, 1999
Dear friends:
Knowing that you are holding a memorial for my little brother touches me deeply. At the same time I am filled with mixed feelings. As you know, today March 29th is the 2nd anniversary of the day my brother Joachim died. My brother's nickname was Jokke, and those closest to him knew him as Jokke.
Retrospectively Jokke was still alive on this day 2 years ago, because WE HIS FAMILY did not yet know that he was dead. I remember talking to our mother on the 1st of April 1997 and making a joke about Jokke. In the following days ... well the story should be known by now. So, today I feel hurt and grief, just as I will feel it on the 3rd of January ... the last day I saw him alive as he left on his journey; and on the 6th of April ... the day we received notice of his death; and on the 17th of April ... the day his body finally arrived home in Denmark; and on the 18th of April ...when I saw him laying in the morgue; and on the 22nd of April ... the day of his funeral. I could go on mentioning "do you remember days" - days we will never forget, because they have become a part of our lives.
One of the huge existential paradoxes of life is death. It is also one of the only things we as the human race have in common, one day we shall all die. WHY? An unanswered question no one is able to answer.
As with "the paradox of life", so is Jokke's death a big paradox. He was a person characterized by a big sense of justice. He cared deeply about human rights and was not afraid to show that he cared. He was not afraid to speak out against inhumane and inexcusable acts of lawlessness and injustice. It is a paradox that two soldiers of a suppressing regime like Cuba should end his life. WHY?
Shall his death remain a mystery, an unanswered question like "the paradox of life"? Somewhere someone knows what happened, and one day justice shall be fulfilled. Then maybe one of many questions can be answered.
A clever and wise person once said that in order to grieve you have to love. In that way love and grief are two very interconnected emotions. As I wrote this, I was told that present today at this memorial are some people from Cuba and/or refugees from other countries where civilian rights are suppressed. You too have perhaps lost a dear person, or you have lost your country. I will think of you as I am sure you will think of Jokke and his family. I hope that one day you will be able to return to your countries, friends, families - your history.
We too shall light a candle today, not only for Jokke, but for victims all over the world. Victims of suppressing and cruel regimes.
We have in Denmark a saying that goes like this: "live for those who are alive, but don't forget the dead." Jokke, we shall never forget you. Most of all because you would never forgive us for not living - you who of all persons were so representative of life itself. Fortunately, we have many lovely and joyful memories.
I still have a brother, but he is not seen by anyone else - he is in a safe place, he is in my heart.
Sincerely and with many thoughts,
Lone Lovschall